Cream Always Rise to the Top
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The Cream Always Rise to the Top
As I watched my daughter play the last Volleyball game for the school season, I couldn’t help but be extremely proud of her growth as a player. I was also extremely proud of a player on the opposing team who too had refined her volleyball skills. As I was leaving the gym I saw the mother of the opposing player, we hugged and exchanged compliments about the girls. Then she asked me if I remembered what I told her several years ago when our girls were the two new players on the same club Volleyball team where they barely played. Like most people I can barely remember what I said a few days ago. With tears in her eyes, she said you told me the cream will always rise to the top. I immediately remembered the Colorado tournament where we had spent A LOT of money only to see our girls standing on the sideline, cheering the team on while fighting back their own tears. Both girls were starters on their prior club teams and weren’t accustomed to not playing. As parents, we hurt when our children hurt, but I knew back then that that was a teachable moment my daughter needed in order to understand that other people’s opinions do not define her, not even her coach. The mother went on to explain how she and her daughter held on to those words whenever things got tough.
As I left the gym I reminisced on when me, my siblings and cousins would sit on my grandparents back porch rocking mason jars back-n-forth filled with fresh cow milk waiting for it to turn to butter. After a lot of patience and some sore arms, we would start to see the butter at the top of the jar. Big mama would tell us “the cream will always rise to the top”. Yes Big mama, it still does!
What Are You Bringing To The Table
Until you recognize the energy that you’re bringing to the table, you will always see life as happening to you. I believe that we manifest what we hold in our hearts and mind. When you aimlessly go through life jumping from one emotion to another not recognizing the thoughts or feelings that you’re holding, then you unknowingly create your reality.
For many years I would speak positive words throughout the day but at night before falling asleep I would daydream about relationship crises where I had to endure pain and humiliation. These daydreams would be so vivid that I would sometimes cry myself to sleep. During those years I found myself in unfulfilling and chaotic relationships. I remember asking God why must I experience these tumultuous relationships, and what is the lesson I’m suppose to learn? As I prayed for something better to come, I continued daydreaming about pain and humiliation. Wow! I truly wish that someone would have told me back then that thoughts and feelings become things.
My 15-year-old daughter constantly hear these words from me as she navigates high school, peer pressure and team sports. Whenever her words or even body language reflects something that I know she doesn’t desire, I give her that gentle reminder, Thoughts Become Things! What energy are you holding?
GRATITUDE JAR
Last weekend I spent a few hours with several of my nieces discussing gratitude and thanksgiving. As I listened to these young ladies, whose ages ranged from late teens to early twenties, I was humbled and filled with hope as they spoke their unapologetic truths with clear and concise visions of their goals and dreams. No egos, arrogance or boisterous behaviors, just calm discourse with a few chuckles and giggles when placed in the spotlight. As I took in their words and energy, one comment really made my heart smile. My niece Jamillah shared with the group how she maintains a Gratitude Jar. She said that her gratitude jar holds the smallest of things like “I had a delicious subway sandwich today” to “thank you for allowing me to wake-up this morning”. She went on to say that “when I have a hard day I open up my jar, pour out the pieces of paper and read them. As I read these gratitude notes, I’m reminded of how blessed I am and my hard day becomes softer and eventually goes away.”
Gratitude is the fastest way to manifest the things you want in your life. When you give thanks for what you already have, then the universe aligns with that energy thereby giving you more to be thankful for. The Gratitude Jar is a visual which many of us need, so thank you Jamillah I now have a Gratitude Jar as well.
Never Run Back to What Broke You
Never Run Back to What Broke You
I ran across the words “Never run back to what broke you” a few days ago, and just like that song that keeps playing in your head that you heard on the radio, so to do these words keep resurfacing.
As I contemplate these reoccurring words, I instinctively know their meaning but then my ego jumps in, clouds my thoughts by creating false narratives and justifications as to why these words keep resurfacing. I find myself going down the path of “I’m tired and that’s why I keep thinking of these words” or “they’re just words and have nothing to do with me.” So many times I have returned to something that broke me and instead of walking away, I found myself seeking signs from the universe to justify my return, only to be broken again. What I know for sure right now is that everything happens for a reason and these reoccurring words are a preamble from my higher state of consciousness. How I choose to honor these words is totally up to me. So as I’m washing clothes or driving my daughter to school and these words resurface, I choose listen to the words and I choose to feel the words. What I hear is don’t keep going back to a situation that’s full of empty promises. What I feel is I deserve to be complete and whole, and I can’t be whole and broken at the same time. When you reach this point it’s good to lean heavily on strength and courage. This strength will push you when you’ve become to weak to move, and this courage will help you stay the course without looking back. There comes a time when the sweetest thing you can do is love yourself. When you truly understand this you will never return to what broke you ever again.
A Number Can’t Define You
My daughter came home excited about making the varsity volleyball team, however she was disappointed that she didn’t get the jersey number she had hoped for. I listened to her express her feelings about not getting her first, second or third choice and somehow ended up with “some random number” that wasn’t appealing to her. This conversation lasted all the way home but before we departed the car I started to speak.
“Sweetie never let a number define you because you’re more than just a number! You take that “random number” and make it the most “recognizable number” on the court. Your skills and talent can’t be contained nor measured by a number on your jersey. I know who you are and I know what you’re capable of doing, so let’s have a great season and remember to play your game!”
A Mother’s Strength and Love for Her Child
For the past several weeks I’ve been watching an 11-year-old boy courageously battle Stevens-Johnson syndrome.
Stevens–Johnson syndrome is a rare, serious disorder of your skin and mucous membranes. It’s usually a reaction to a medication or an infection. Often, it begins with flu-like symptoms, followed by a painful red or purplish rash that spreads and blisters.
I see machines assisting his body while I see him fighting to regain control of his body. His strength is undeniable and his courage is like a lion. As I watch this young boy make the long journey back to being the “A” student who loves school, the gamer who enjoys playing with his younger brother and friends, and the polite young man with a warm smile, I can’t help but notice his mother’s strength. I watch as she prayed for him, gently speaking words of encouragement and life into his ear. I watch as she touches his exposed finger and toe, causing his racing heart rate to slow down. As she listens to the doctor’s updates, realizing that his ICU residence and breathing tubes will last much longer then she had hoped, her strength and calm tone doesn’t waver in the presence of her son, but she is only human.
During the evening, away from her son, she texted, “I’m having a hard time coping with my fears”. Her seven friends texted back with words of encouragement and love. My text to her said:
(Name omitted) you know what fear is (false evidence appearing real). Release those thoughts and hold on to what God has placed in your heart and the heart of your son. Grace is all around you – your family, your friends and God! Hold on to that. Hold tight! The ride is filled with bumps and turns. It’s filled with highs and lows, but eventually it will stop and you will be able to get off and resume your life. Stay resolute while Grace covers you.
I understand that this life journey will sometimes bring you to your knees, but it’s how we get up and keep moving forward that defines us. I am humbled and grateful to be a witness and friend as both mother and son make this journey together.
Check out this book – Personal SJS Journey:
Who Could Have Imagined!: My Stevens-Johnson Syndrome Experience
Change is Normal
To go through changes is normal … to remain stagnant is abnormal. Change may feel uncomfortable at first, but you will eventually wonder “how did I remain in that place for that long”.
How Surrender Feels to Me
For me surrendering is letting go of how I want, need or hope things to unfold. I simply become still within myself, trusting that the universe has my back.
No Explanation Required!
My Journey is “My Journey”. No need to explain myself.